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Can I Resolve My Resentments?

Emotions involved with addiction recovery do not change overnight.  The process can take weeks, months, or years to overcome. Changing behaviors and habits are a few of the first steps.  Understanding personal feelings also need attention. Resentment can play a part in the addict’s emotional bank as well as people involved in the individual’s life.  The addict could hold a grudge against someone taking drugs or alcohol away. An intervention can trigger resentment, also. Misinterpretation of resentment can be an issue, too.  Someone could give a smug look. The addict doesn’t realize the glare is not towards them. Wherever the resentment comes from, the individual needs to learn how to understand others and communicate properly to resolve the issue.

Just as the addict has become accustomed to certain behaviors and habits, others have, also.  Friends and family have gotten used to the individual being untrustworthy and manipulative. No matter how hard the addict tries to change, loved ones refuse to see the differences.  Small changes are what move the addict forward to a successful recovery. Resentment masks change from view. The teeter-totter effect will keep resentful feelings between both parties.  When the addict begins to understand people around him or her the cycle can be broken, at least for the individual. Other parties involved may take longer to understand the addict.

The person in recovery is still learning about themselves.  Others cannot understand if the addict doesn’t know themselves, yet.  Being sober creates a new person. Learning new ways to be joyful without the use of substances sounds easy.  The difficulty is trial and error. Spending time with friends and family while trying to enjoy new activities can cause unneeded and new resentments when the addict is unsure if they like the new hobby.  Separation, apologies, and short visits will eliminate the pressure on both parties. Slowly progressing into new relationships will give time to heal.

Coming home from treatment is a drastic change.  The best option for the addict is to have short interactions with others to ease back into relationships.  Communication skills will build with time. Facing more difficult emotions is possible when everyone is prepared to communicate effectively.  Pushing someone into talking about difficult times could cause more resentment and anger. Communicating needs and wants in smaller doses support the addict in healing.  Everyone will not be overwhelmed with heavy feelings. Expectations won’t be as high for both parties, also.

We’re cultivating resilience for lasting wellness. Resilient House offers the highest quality behavioral health treatment to help heal addictions. Bringing together spiritual guides and holistic experts with trained clinicians, our programs are changing lives. Call us today for information: 833-change1 (833-242-6431).